highlights: the "on crack" version

May 2, 2009 by

much to my dismay, i’ve managed to again disappear for days on end. perhaps i’ve forgotten the very realities of my life. i have two very active and demanding children clinging either to my leg or my breast- one crazy daredevil and one saucy italiana. what exactly do i expect to get done?!
answer: everything. right?
correct answer: nothing…unless i’m really lucky.

here are some highlights, the “on crack” version:
i can’t seem to make any progress anywhere. not even a little. tripping over myself while elias follows me around begging for me to play with him. i desperately sidestep, trying to organize my brain and my to-do list. after lunch, i put them both down for their naps. decide to dig up every shrub in my front lawn and transplant them in the backyard. just real quick.

get my shovel and pick axe [you need a pick axe in new england– i can’t tell you how many times my aviators saved my eyeballs from flying rock shards. this soil is nuts.] i dig up 3 bushes, 1 rhododendron, and two smaller plants before the kids even wake. i also replant every perennial flower i put in last year. and some random bulbs. and some potted flowers i had kicking around. i realize that night as my body is utterly exhausted that i’m TOTALLY my dad. i’m a little psycho running around cutting things down, digging things up, hyper-focused and hyper-speed. [not all of you know my father, but those of you who do know just what i’m talking about] :)

my sister lauri and her kids come over to play. elias loves isabella. she’s 5. he loves isaiah, who will be 2 in july, but mostly gives him stiff arms. we have a nice lunch together. suddenly it’s 2:00. way past nap time. kids take short naps. michelle is sad. when i go to get piper out of her crib, i snap her neck off. not really. but i tweak something and she screams. and screams. my dad calls. wants to play with the kids. i say ‘come save me!’ he and scouty, our old pit-bull come to play, piper snuggles him for hours and calms down. we throw scout sticks, we talk about gardening, composting, and psycho thorn weeds. elias is happy. dada comes home for dinner. pip seems to be doing better. reality- she is not.
piper wakes up at 11:30 just as we’re going to bed. why are we awake so late? no explanation. we’re dumb, that’s why. i try to put her back down. she screams. LOUD. i rock her. and rock her. for hours. she won’t go in her crib. one wrong move and she is clearly in pain. so i pray for a miracle. i put her in bed. she stays awake and kicks me. i want to strangle her because i’m tired and it’s like, 3am. i put her in her crib. she falls asleep. then she wakes up again. dada’s turn. battle #2. she falls asleep at 4:30. i want to poke my eyeballs out.

i’m deliriously tired. elias needs to go see his GI specialist from Childrens. i decide to take them both alone. we fare well. in and out quickly. piper isn’t screaming anymore. thank you jesus for healing her busted neck. i make the doctor check her neck anyway. he says it seems fine. i agree. jesus rocks. elias has made good progress. we’re all happy. time to wean him off miralax. pray for us! doctor gives go ahead to potty train. but i cannot push eli or i’ll undo all our months of work. fine with me. as long as he eventually poops in a toilet, i’m cool. i pack up kids, make lunch, put kids down for naps. i lay down t take a nap. i fall asleep. the doorbell rings. AWESOME. i try to fall asleep again. i half sleep for another hour. elias wakes up. we snuggle in bed. piper wakes up. i need to clean for couples group. hustle bustle. food prep, vacuum, dust, wash, pick-up. the usual. i like to clean. it makes me happy. eli and i make a dessert. company arrives. we eat. i put kids to bed. great discussion on historical revisionism and whether war is justifiable. i love our friends. 10:00, everyone is gone. dave and i clean up. we work on some things for his council of elders meeting. it’s really late. bed again. piper sleeps. michelle is happy.

elias and mama play while dada is at his meeting. we read books. we play bob the builder. we eat pop tarts and drink tea. piper naps. i surf the web. elias climbs all over me, begging to play tractor tippin on the cars website. piper wakes up. we go upstairs., i curl my hair. it look ridiculous. me and eli try on some red lipstick. we look good. a little hide and seek, then pip gets hungry. i feed her. dada comes home. he likes my hair. i laugh at him. we make lunch. i talk on phone to ash and ams, coordinate a little reunion at lasell’s 2009 fashion show. me and lee chat and make plans to meet and drive up. girls night. SO exciting. i write this blog. dave taunts me, saying a good wife would snuggle him.

he’s right.

and so i’m off!

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  1. Nick

    Our Elias killed his neck one time. It was funny, now that you look back on it and he is ok. He was like an old man who slept on it wrong.

    All he did was watch TV all day on the couch. He has never stayed still that long. Any time he laughed…he would cry. Really funny.

  2. sirkalicious so delicious

    hang in there lovey. our date is soon. and i plan to love all up on e & p so until they are so tired they sleep like big kids ;)you are a good mumma. i REALLY miss my boyfriend.

  3. michelle

    aww, kris- thanks :) we (esp. i) miss you, too. LOTS. can’t wait to see you…